Thursday, August 23, 2012
This is Good
The story is told of a king in Africa who had a close friend with whom he grew up. The friend had a habit of looking at every situation that ever occurred in his life (positive or negative) and remarking, "This is good!"
One day the king and his friend were out on a hunting expedition. The friend would load and prepare the guns for the king. The friend had apparently done something wrong in preparing one of the guns, for after taking the gun from his friend, the king fired it and his thumb was blown off.
Examining the situation the friend remarked as usual, "This is good!"
To which the king replied, "No, this is NOT good!" and proceeded to send his friend to jail.
About a year later, the king was hunting in an area that he should have known to stay clear of. Cannibals captured him and took them to their village. They tied his hands, stacked some wood, set up a stake and bound him to the stake. As they came near to set fire to the wood, they noticed that the king was missing a thumb. Being superstitious, they never ate anyone that was less than whole. So untying the king, they sent him on his way.
As he returned home, he was reminded of the event that had taken his thumb and felt remorse for his treatment of his friend. He went immediately to the jail to speak with his friend. "You were right," he said, "it was good that my thumb was blown off. And he proceeded to tell the friend all that had just happened. "And so I am very sorry for sending you to jail for so long. It was bad of me to do this."
"No" his friend replied, "This is good!"
"What do you mean, "This is good?" How could it be good that I sent my friend to jail for a year?"
"If I had NOT been in jail, I would have been with you when you were captured."
Situations may not always seem pleasant while we are in them, but the promise of God is clear. If we love Him and live our lives according to His precepts, even that which seems to be bleak and hopeless will be turned by God for His glory and our benefit.
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
The World's Worst Jobs
- Nuclear Warhead Sensitivity Technician
- Circus Elephant Clean Up Specialist
- Rotten Sardine Taste Detector
- Assistant To The Boss's Nephew
- Shark Baiter
- Hurricane Photographer
- Director Of Public Relations, Chernobyl Nuclear Facility
- Prison Glee Club President
- Road Kill Removal Crew
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Love
The best part of being in love with someone is being convinced that that person will be with us forever. Most of us start relationship believing in the promise of love without end. Unfortunately, not all relationships end the way we want them to.
To some, love comes in a fleeting moment and goes just as fast. But getting over the feeling always seems to take a lifetime, because the only person who can heal the pain is usually the very same person who hurt us and made us cry.
Sometimes just as we are about to accept the failure of our relationship, that person comes back to us and unknowingly destroys our defenses. Suddenly, we find ourselves hooked on love again. And it hurts even more because we know that person doesn’t share the same feeling anymore.
Even if there is the urge to forget because it hurts, there would always be that compelling reason to hope for love to come back. It is like waiting for the sun to shine in the middle of a storm.
The love that brings us pain should be the same love that would heal our hearts. When you love so much that it begins to hurt, then you have to learn to let go to lessen your pain.
Love hurts, and sometimes it hurts like there is no tomorrow. But there still is and there will always be one. No matter how battered and stricken we have been, there will always be a tomorrow that will bring hope and love. But that tomorrow will never come unless we leave the past behind and live today as we should.
Let the pain remain for a while and let the tears fall as they please. Then after all that, move on and find your place in this world where you will feel that everything is going to be all right.”
To some, love comes in a fleeting moment and goes just as fast. But getting over the feeling always seems to take a lifetime, because the only person who can heal the pain is usually the very same person who hurt us and made us cry.
Sometimes just as we are about to accept the failure of our relationship, that person comes back to us and unknowingly destroys our defenses. Suddenly, we find ourselves hooked on love again. And it hurts even more because we know that person doesn’t share the same feeling anymore.
Even if there is the urge to forget because it hurts, there would always be that compelling reason to hope for love to come back. It is like waiting for the sun to shine in the middle of a storm.
The love that brings us pain should be the same love that would heal our hearts. When you love so much that it begins to hurt, then you have to learn to let go to lessen your pain.
Love hurts, and sometimes it hurts like there is no tomorrow. But there still is and there will always be one. No matter how battered and stricken we have been, there will always be a tomorrow that will bring hope and love. But that tomorrow will never come unless we leave the past behind and live today as we should.
Let the pain remain for a while and let the tears fall as they please. Then after all that, move on and find your place in this world where you will feel that everything is going to be all right.”
Thursday, December 3, 2009
COMMITMENT
The most important, most critical component in successful loving is commitment. Not love. It’s easy to love without commitment. People do it all the time—easy to love, to give of oneself for a while. But commitment implies bonding in such a way that one promises to keep the fires of love burning indefinitely.
In the countless counseling sessions I have had with troubled couples over the years, there has always been the problem of a failing commitment on the part of at least one of the partners. Unless there is the raising of the level of commitment, the relationship is doomed. It’s finished. Sooner or later the stresses will take their toll and the relationship will begin to fall apart. On the other hand, look carefully at couples who are still very much in love after 20, 25 years. Their commitment to each other cannot be shaken. Neither can their love.
It also means shutting one’s heart to the possibility of loving another who might even be more attractive, even more lovable. Not easy. This is why solid commitments are not at all as common as we are led to believe. In fact, more often than not, I think that the commitment two lovers make are not equal. What I mean is that the commitment of one might be a whole lot more or a whole lot less than the partner’s.
We see it all the time. One loves more than the other, is more committed than the other. It is false to believe that two lovers love each other to the same degree. We have often seen lopsided love relationships where one partner is giving so much more to the relationship than the other.
But writers and poets seem to always indicate that love isn’t just a two-way street, but an equal two-way street.
That hardly ever happens. It is impossible to determine exactly how much a man loves a woman or how much a woman cares for a man. Love cannot be measured and that can be a huge problem. You can love someone and tell him “I love you” and you’re telling the truth. But how much do you love him? Enough to let him court you? Enough to marry him? Enough to die for him?
The greatest test of true love is commitment. And the greatest indicator of deep love is deep commitment. There can be no doubting this.
I have heard people say all the right words, make all the right moves and pledge undying love, only to walk away weeks or months later.
Were they in love? Sure they were. But not enough to allow them to hold strong in their love. Not enough to keep a commitment regardless of the pain.
A lover gets this sinking feeling when there is a sense that one is more committed than the other. When one is giving a lot more than one is receiving, when one’s love is a lot more solid than the creaky love of the partner.
When a couple believes strongly that their commitment to each other is rock solid, there is a deep sense of security, a feeling that it’s okay to give all because the gift of yourself is safe in the hands of the beloved. If, however, there is doubt or, even worse, the conviction that one is engaged in one-way giving, in a one-way commitment that is lopsided, then there is a tendency to pull back and not give as much. And when that happens, love begins to fade.
In the countless counseling sessions I have had with troubled couples over the years, there has always been the problem of a failing commitment on the part of at least one of the partners. Unless there is the raising of the level of commitment, the relationship is doomed. It’s finished. Sooner or later the stresses will take their toll and the relationship will begin to fall apart. On the other hand, look carefully at couples who are still very much in love after 20, 25 years. Their commitment to each other cannot be shaken. Neither can their love.
It also means shutting one’s heart to the possibility of loving another who might even be more attractive, even more lovable. Not easy. This is why solid commitments are not at all as common as we are led to believe. In fact, more often than not, I think that the commitment two lovers make are not equal. What I mean is that the commitment of one might be a whole lot more or a whole lot less than the partner’s.
We see it all the time. One loves more than the other, is more committed than the other. It is false to believe that two lovers love each other to the same degree. We have often seen lopsided love relationships where one partner is giving so much more to the relationship than the other.
But writers and poets seem to always indicate that love isn’t just a two-way street, but an equal two-way street.
That hardly ever happens. It is impossible to determine exactly how much a man loves a woman or how much a woman cares for a man. Love cannot be measured and that can be a huge problem. You can love someone and tell him “I love you” and you’re telling the truth. But how much do you love him? Enough to let him court you? Enough to marry him? Enough to die for him?
The greatest test of true love is commitment. And the greatest indicator of deep love is deep commitment. There can be no doubting this.
I have heard people say all the right words, make all the right moves and pledge undying love, only to walk away weeks or months later.
Were they in love? Sure they were. But not enough to allow them to hold strong in their love. Not enough to keep a commitment regardless of the pain.
A lover gets this sinking feeling when there is a sense that one is more committed than the other. When one is giving a lot more than one is receiving, when one’s love is a lot more solid than the creaky love of the partner.
When a couple believes strongly that their commitment to each other is rock solid, there is a deep sense of security, a feeling that it’s okay to give all because the gift of yourself is safe in the hands of the beloved. If, however, there is doubt or, even worse, the conviction that one is engaged in one-way giving, in a one-way commitment that is lopsided, then there is a tendency to pull back and not give as much. And when that happens, love begins to fade.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Facts about November
Traditions including All Saints Day and All Souls Day
The name comes from the Roman word 'novem' meaning nine, because it was the ninth month in their Roman calendar.
Few people find November pleasant. The Anglo-Saxons called November 'Wind monath', because it was the time when the cold winds began to blow. They also called it 'Blod monath', because it was the time when carnival charactercattle were slaughtered for winter food. The poet T.S. Elliot called it 'Sombre November'. Sir Walter Scott, in his long poem Marmion, wrote in 1808:
November's sky is chill and drear,
November's leaf is red and sear (withered)'
The first week of November has always been a time of festivals and celebrations marking the end of the harvest and beginning of Winter
All Saints' Day - 1 November
In the year 835 AD the Roman Catholic Church made 1st November a church holiday to honour all the saints. This feast day is called All Saints' Day.
All Hallows
All Saints' Day used to be known as All Hallows (Hallow being an old word meaning Saint or Holy Person). The feast day actually started the previous evening, the Eve of All Hallows or Hallowe'en.
Christians remember all the saints
On Saints' Day, Christians remember all 'men of good will' (saints), great ones and forgotten ones, who have died through the ages.
Saints are men and women from all ages and all walks of life, who were outstanding Christians. Some - the martyrs - died for their faith. All of them are honoured by the church.
Hallowtide
All Saints' Day, together with All Souls' Day are know collectively as Hallowtide.
The name comes from the Roman word 'novem' meaning nine, because it was the ninth month in their Roman calendar.
Few people find November pleasant. The Anglo-Saxons called November 'Wind monath', because it was the time when the cold winds began to blow. They also called it 'Blod monath', because it was the time when carnival charactercattle were slaughtered for winter food. The poet T.S. Elliot called it 'Sombre November'. Sir Walter Scott, in his long poem Marmion, wrote in 1808:
November's sky is chill and drear,
November's leaf is red and sear (withered)'
The first week of November has always been a time of festivals and celebrations marking the end of the harvest and beginning of Winter
All Saints' Day - 1 November
In the year 835 AD the Roman Catholic Church made 1st November a church holiday to honour all the saints. This feast day is called All Saints' Day.
All Hallows
All Saints' Day used to be known as All Hallows (Hallow being an old word meaning Saint or Holy Person). The feast day actually started the previous evening, the Eve of All Hallows or Hallowe'en.
Christians remember all the saints
On Saints' Day, Christians remember all 'men of good will' (saints), great ones and forgotten ones, who have died through the ages.
Saints are men and women from all ages and all walks of life, who were outstanding Christians. Some - the martyrs - died for their faith. All of them are honoured by the church.
Hallowtide
All Saints' Day, together with All Souls' Day are know collectively as Hallowtide.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Selective Hearing
What a woman says:
This place is a mess! C'mon,
you and I need to clean up.
Your stuff is lying on the floor and you'll have no clothes to wear
if we don't do laundry right now!
What a man hears:
blah, blah, blah, blah, C'MON
YOU AND I blah, blah, blah
blah, blah ON THE FLOOR
blah, blah, blah, NO CLOTHES, blah
blah, blah, blah, blah, RIGHT NOW!
This place is a mess! C'mon,
you and I need to clean up.
Your stuff is lying on the floor and you'll have no clothes to wear
if we don't do laundry right now!
What a man hears:
blah, blah, blah, blah, C'MON
YOU AND I blah, blah, blah
blah, blah ON THE FLOOR
blah, blah, blah, NO CLOTHES, blah
blah, blah, blah, blah, RIGHT NOW!
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Friendship
I Believe
I believe-
That we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.
I believe-
That no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a
while and, you must forgive them for that.
I believe-
That true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance.
Same goes for true love.
I believe-
That you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.
I believe-
That it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.
I believe-
That you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them
I believe-
That you can keep going long after you can't.
I believe-
That we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.
I believe-
That we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.
I believe-
That no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a
while and, you must forgive them for that.
I believe-
That true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance.
Same goes for true love.
I believe-
That you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.
I believe-
That it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.
I believe-
That you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them
I believe-
That you can keep going long after you can't.
I believe-
That we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.
I believe-
That either you control your attitude or it controls you.
I believe-
That regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there
had better be something else to take its place.
I believe-
That heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done,
regardless of the consequences.
That either you control your attitude or it controls you.
I believe-
That regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there
had better be something else to take its place.
I believe-
That heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done,
regardless of the consequences.
I believe-
That money is a lousy way of keeping score.
I believe-
That my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time!
I believe-
That sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down, will be the ones to help you get back up.
That money is a lousy way of keeping score.
I believe-
That my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time!
I believe-
That sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down, will be the ones to help you get back up.
I believe-
That sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.
I believe-
That just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
I believe-
That maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've
learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.
That sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.
I believe-
That just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
I believe-
That maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've
learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.
I believe-
That it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others.
Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.
I believe-
That no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.
I believe-
That our background and circumstances may have influenced
who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.
That it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others.
Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.
I believe-
That no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.
I believe-
That our background and circumstances may have influenced
who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.
I believe-
That just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other, And just
because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.
I believe-
That you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.
I believe-
That two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.
That just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other, And just
because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.
I believe-
That you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.
I believe-
That two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.
I believe-
That your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.
I believe-
That even when you think you have no more to give, when a
friend cries out to you - you will find the strength to help.
I believe-
That credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.
That your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.
I believe-
That even when you think you have no more to give, when a
friend cries out to you - you will find the strength to help.
I believe-
That credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.
I believe-
That the people you care about most in life are the essence of life.
Tell them today how much you love them and what they mean to you.
That the people you care about most in life are the essence of life.
Tell them today how much you love them and what they mean to you.
Friday, October 23, 2009
God's Conversation With Eve
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, "Lord, I have a problem!"
"What's the problem, Eve?"
"Lord, I know you've created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedy snake, but I'm just not happy."
"Why is that, Eve?", comes the reply from above.
"Lord, I am lonely. And I'm sick to death of apples."
"Well, Eve, in that case I have a solution. I shall create a man for you."
"What's a 'man,' Lord?"
"This man will be a flawed creature, with aggressive tendencies, an enormous ego and an inability to empathize or listen to you properly. All in all he'll give you a hard time. But he'll be bigger and faster and more muscular than you, he'll be really good at fighting and kicking a ball about and hunting fleet-footed ruminants, and not altogether bad in the sack."
"Sounds great," says Eve, with an ironically raised eyebrow.
"Yeah, well. He's better than a poke in the eye with a burnt stick. But you can have him on one condition."
"What's that, Lord?"
"You'll have to let him believe that I made him first."
"What's the problem, Eve?"
"Lord, I know you've created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedy snake, but I'm just not happy."
"Why is that, Eve?", comes the reply from above.
"Lord, I am lonely. And I'm sick to death of apples."
"Well, Eve, in that case I have a solution. I shall create a man for you."
"What's a 'man,' Lord?"
"This man will be a flawed creature, with aggressive tendencies, an enormous ego and an inability to empathize or listen to you properly. All in all he'll give you a hard time. But he'll be bigger and faster and more muscular than you, he'll be really good at fighting and kicking a ball about and hunting fleet-footed ruminants, and not altogether bad in the sack."
"Sounds great," says Eve, with an ironically raised eyebrow.
"Yeah, well. He's better than a poke in the eye with a burnt stick. But you can have him on one condition."
"What's that, Lord?"
"You'll have to let him believe that I made him first."
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Men's Translation Guide For Women
"I'm going fishing."
Really means...
"I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety."
"It's a guy thing."
Really means....
"There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."
"Can I help with dinner?"
Really means....
"Why isn't it already on the table?"
"Uh huh," "Sure, honey," or "Yes, dear."
Really means....
Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.
"It would take too long to explain."
Really means...
"I have no idea how it works."
"I'm getting more exercise lately."
Really means....
"The batteries in the remote are dead."
"We're going to be late."
Really means....
"Now I have a legitimate excuse to drive like a maniac."
"I was listening to you. It's just that I have things on my mind."
Really means....
"I was wondering if that red-head over there is wearing a bra."
"Take a break, honey, you're working too hard."
Really means....
"I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."
"That's interesting, dear."
Really means....
"Are you still talking?"
"Honey, we don't need material things to prove our love."
Really means....
"I forgot our anniversary again."
"You expect too much of me."
Really means....
"You want me to stay awake."
"It's a really good movie."
Really means....
"It's got guns, knives, fast cars, and Heather Locklear."
"That's women's work."
Really means....
"It's difficult, dirty, and thankless."
"Will you marry me?"
Really means....
"Both my roommates have moved out, I can't find the washer, and there is no more peanut butter."
"You know how bad my memory is."
Really means....
"I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed and the Vehicle Identification Numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."
"I was just thinking about you, and got you these roses."
Really means....
"The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."
"Oh, don't fuss. I just cut myself, it's no big deal."
Really means....
"I have severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit I'm hurt."
"I do help around the house."
Really means....
"I once put a dirty towel in the laundry basket."
"Hey, I've got my reasons for what I'm doing."
Really means....
"I sure hope I think of some reasons pretty soon."
"I can't find it."
Really means....
"It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
"What did I do this time?"
Really means....
"What did you catch me doing?"
"She's one of those rabid feminists."
Really means....
"She refused to make my coffee."
"I heard you."
Really means....
"I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."
"You know I could never love anyone else."
Really means....
"I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."
"You look terrific."
Really means....
"Oh, God, please don't try on one more outfit. I'm starving."
"I brought you a present."
Really means....
"It was free ice scraper night at the ball game."
"I missed you."
Really means....
"I can't find my sock drawer, the kids are hungry and we are out of toilet paper."
"I'm not lost. I know exactly where we are."
Really means....
"I'm lost. I have no idea where we are, and no one will ever see us alive again."
"We share the housework."
Really means....
"I make the messes, you clean them up."
"This relationship is getting too serious."
Really means....
"You're cutting into the time I spend with my truck."
"I don't need to read the instructions."
Really means....
"I am perfectly capable of screwing it up without printed help."
"I'll fix the garbage disposal later."
Really means....
"If I wait long enough you'll get frustrated and buy a new one."
"I broke up with her."
Really means....
"She dumped me."
Really means...
"I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety."
"It's a guy thing."
Really means....
"There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."
"Can I help with dinner?"
Really means....
"Why isn't it already on the table?"
"Uh huh," "Sure, honey," or "Yes, dear."
Really means....
Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.
"It would take too long to explain."
Really means...
"I have no idea how it works."
"I'm getting more exercise lately."
Really means....
"The batteries in the remote are dead."
"We're going to be late."
Really means....
"Now I have a legitimate excuse to drive like a maniac."
"I was listening to you. It's just that I have things on my mind."
Really means....
"I was wondering if that red-head over there is wearing a bra."
"Take a break, honey, you're working too hard."
Really means....
"I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."
"That's interesting, dear."
Really means....
"Are you still talking?"
"Honey, we don't need material things to prove our love."
Really means....
"I forgot our anniversary again."
"You expect too much of me."
Really means....
"You want me to stay awake."
"It's a really good movie."
Really means....
"It's got guns, knives, fast cars, and Heather Locklear."
"That's women's work."
Really means....
"It's difficult, dirty, and thankless."
"Will you marry me?"
Really means....
"Both my roommates have moved out, I can't find the washer, and there is no more peanut butter."
"You know how bad my memory is."
Really means....
"I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed and the Vehicle Identification Numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."
"I was just thinking about you, and got you these roses."
Really means....
"The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."
"Oh, don't fuss. I just cut myself, it's no big deal."
Really means....
"I have severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit I'm hurt."
"I do help around the house."
Really means....
"I once put a dirty towel in the laundry basket."
"Hey, I've got my reasons for what I'm doing."
Really means....
"I sure hope I think of some reasons pretty soon."
"I can't find it."
Really means....
"It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
"What did I do this time?"
Really means....
"What did you catch me doing?"
"She's one of those rabid feminists."
Really means....
"She refused to make my coffee."
"I heard you."
Really means....
"I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."
"You know I could never love anyone else."
Really means....
"I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."
"You look terrific."
Really means....
"Oh, God, please don't try on one more outfit. I'm starving."
"I brought you a present."
Really means....
"It was free ice scraper night at the ball game."
"I missed you."
Really means....
"I can't find my sock drawer, the kids are hungry and we are out of toilet paper."
"I'm not lost. I know exactly where we are."
Really means....
"I'm lost. I have no idea where we are, and no one will ever see us alive again."
"We share the housework."
Really means....
"I make the messes, you clean them up."
"This relationship is getting too serious."
Really means....
"You're cutting into the time I spend with my truck."
"I don't need to read the instructions."
Really means....
"I am perfectly capable of screwing it up without printed help."
"I'll fix the garbage disposal later."
Really means....
"If I wait long enough you'll get frustrated and buy a new one."
"I broke up with her."
Really means....
"She dumped me."
Sunday, October 18, 2009
If Women Ran The World...
A man would no longer be considered a "good catch" simply because he is breathing.
Medical research money would be spent on developing new birth control methods for men.
Women with cold hands would give men prostate exams.
Baby-sitting, doing dishes and making beds would be considered "Macho".
The hem of men's pants would go up or down depending on the economy.
Men would be forced to purchase overpriced clothes every season.
Minnie Mouse would get equal billing with Mickey.
Fewer women would be dieting because the ideal weight standard would increase by 40 pounds.
Overweight men would be encouraged to wear girdles.
PMS would be a legitimate defense in court.
Men would come with papers showing their true identity, marital and employment status, if they live with their mother, and whether they have had their shots.
Shopping would be considered an aerobic activity.
Men would get reputations for sleeping around.
"Ms. Magazine" would have an annual swimsuit issue featuring scantily clad male models.
Men who designed women's shoes would be forced to wear them.
Men would not be allowed to eat gas-producing foods within two hours of bedtime.
Men would be as attentive AFTER marriage as they were before.
Men would be secretaries for female bosses, working twice as hard for none of the credit.
Little girls would read "Snow White and the Seven Hunks".
Men would earn 70 cents for every dollar women make.
Men would bring drinks, chips and dip to women watching soap operas.
Men would HAVE to get Playboy for the articles, because there would be no pictures.
Men would learn phrases like: I'm sorry, I love you, You're beautiful, Of course you don't look fat in that outfit, Go to sleep-I'll take care of the baby, etc.
Men would be judged entirely by their looks, women by their accomplishments.
Men would sit around and wonder what WE are thinking.
Men would pay as much attention to their women as their cars.
All toilet seats would be nailed down.
Men would work on relationships as much as they work on their careers.
TV news segments on sports would never run longer than one minute.
All men would be forced to spend one month in a PMS simulator.
Men would have their wedding rings permanently attached so they can't pretend to be single.
During mid-life crisis, men would get hot-flashes and women would date 19 year old boys.
Overweight men would have their weight brought to their attention constantly.
After a baby is born, men would take a six-week paternity leave to wait on their wives hand and foot.
For basic training, soldiers would have to take care of a two-year old for six weeks.
A female employee would be noticed for her work performance, not her bra size.
Singles bars would have metal detectors to weed out men hiding wedding rings in their pockets.
Medical research money would be spent on developing new birth control methods for men.
Women with cold hands would give men prostate exams.
Baby-sitting, doing dishes and making beds would be considered "Macho".
The hem of men's pants would go up or down depending on the economy.
Men would be forced to purchase overpriced clothes every season.
Minnie Mouse would get equal billing with Mickey.
Fewer women would be dieting because the ideal weight standard would increase by 40 pounds.
Overweight men would be encouraged to wear girdles.
PMS would be a legitimate defense in court.
Men would come with papers showing their true identity, marital and employment status, if they live with their mother, and whether they have had their shots.
Shopping would be considered an aerobic activity.
Men would get reputations for sleeping around.
"Ms. Magazine" would have an annual swimsuit issue featuring scantily clad male models.
Men who designed women's shoes would be forced to wear them.
Men would not be allowed to eat gas-producing foods within two hours of bedtime.
Men would be as attentive AFTER marriage as they were before.
Men would be secretaries for female bosses, working twice as hard for none of the credit.
Little girls would read "Snow White and the Seven Hunks".
Men would earn 70 cents for every dollar women make.
Men would bring drinks, chips and dip to women watching soap operas.
Men would HAVE to get Playboy for the articles, because there would be no pictures.
Men would learn phrases like: I'm sorry, I love you, You're beautiful, Of course you don't look fat in that outfit, Go to sleep-I'll take care of the baby, etc.
Men would be judged entirely by their looks, women by their accomplishments.
Men would sit around and wonder what WE are thinking.
Men would pay as much attention to their women as their cars.
All toilet seats would be nailed down.
Men would work on relationships as much as they work on their careers.
TV news segments on sports would never run longer than one minute.
All men would be forced to spend one month in a PMS simulator.
Men would have their wedding rings permanently attached so they can't pretend to be single.
During mid-life crisis, men would get hot-flashes and women would date 19 year old boys.
Overweight men would have their weight brought to their attention constantly.
After a baby is born, men would take a six-week paternity leave to wait on their wives hand and foot.
For basic training, soldiers would have to take care of a two-year old for six weeks.
A female employee would be noticed for her work performance, not her bra size.
Singles bars would have metal detectors to weed out men hiding wedding rings in their pockets.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
IF MEN GOT PREGNANT
* Maternity leave would last for two years...with full pay.
* There'd be a cure for stretch marks
* Natural childbirth would become obsolete
* Morning sickness would rank as the nation's number one health problem
* All methods of birth control would be improved 100 percent effectiveness
* Children would be kept in the hospital until they were toilet trained
* Men would be EAGER to talk about commitment
* They wouldn't think twins were quite so cute
* Fathers would demand that their SONS be home from dates by 10:00pm
* Men could use THEIR briefcases as diaper bags
* They'd have to stop saying,"I'm afraid I'll drop him."
* Paternity suits would be a line of clothes
* They'd stay in bed for the entire nine months
* Menus at most restaurants would list ice cream and pickles as an entree
* Women would rule the world!
* There'd be a cure for stretch marks
* Natural childbirth would become obsolete
* Morning sickness would rank as the nation's number one health problem
* All methods of birth control would be improved 100 percent effectiveness
* Children would be kept in the hospital until they were toilet trained
* Men would be EAGER to talk about commitment
* They wouldn't think twins were quite so cute
* Fathers would demand that their SONS be home from dates by 10:00pm
* Men could use THEIR briefcases as diaper bags
* They'd have to stop saying,"I'm afraid I'll drop him."
* Paternity suits would be a line of clothes
* They'd stay in bed for the entire nine months
* Menus at most restaurants would list ice cream and pickles as an entree
* Women would rule the world!
Monday, October 12, 2009
HOW TO TELL A BUSINESSMAN FROM A BUSINESSWOMAN
A businessman is aggressive; a businesswoman is pushy.
A businessman is good on details; she is picky.
He loses his temper because he's so involved in his job; she is bitchy.
When he is depressed (or hung-over), everyone tiptoes past his office; she is moody, so it must be her time of the month.
He follows through; she doesn't know when to quit.
He's confident; she's conceited.
He stands firm; she's impossible to deal with.
He is firm; she is hard.
His judgments are her prejudices.
He drinks because of the excessive job pressure; she's a lush.
He isn't afraid to say what he thinks; she's mouthy.
He's close-mouthed; she's secretive.
He climbed the ladder to success; she slept her way to the top.
He is a stern taskmaster; she's hard to work for.
He is witty; she is sarcastic.
A businessman is good on details; she is picky.
He loses his temper because he's so involved in his job; she is bitchy.
When he is depressed (or hung-over), everyone tiptoes past his office; she is moody, so it must be her time of the month.
He follows through; she doesn't know when to quit.
He's confident; she's conceited.
He stands firm; she's impossible to deal with.
He is firm; she is hard.
His judgments are her prejudices.
He drinks because of the excessive job pressure; she's a lush.
He isn't afraid to say what he thinks; she's mouthy.
He's close-mouthed; she's secretive.
He climbed the ladder to success; she slept her way to the top.
He is a stern taskmaster; she's hard to work for.
He is witty; she is sarcastic.
Monday, September 28, 2009
Children's Prayers
A mother was teaching her 3-year-old the Lord's prayer. For several evenings at bedtime she repeated it after her mother. One night she said she was ready to solo. The mother listened with pride as she carefully enunciated each word, right up to the end of the prayer. "Lead us not into temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us some e-mail, Amen."
A woman invited some people over for dinner. At the table she turned to her six-year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?" The girl replied, "I wouldn't know what to say." "Just say what you heard Mommy say," the mother answered. The daughter bowed her head and said, "Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?
A 5 year old boy was sitting down to eat when his mother asked him to pray for his meal. He replied, "Mom we don't have to. We prayed over this last night." His mother had prepared leftovers from the day before.
A 4-year-old boy who was asked to return thanks before Christmas dinner. The family members bowed their heads in expectation. He began his prayer, thanking God for all his friends, naming them one by one. Then he thanked God for Mommy, Daddy, brother, sister, Grandma, Grandpa, and all his aunts and uncles. Then he began to thank God for the food. He gave thanks for the turkey, the dressing, the fruit salad, the cranberry sauce, the pies, the cakes, even the Cool Whip. Then he paused, and everyone waited--and waited. After a long silence, the young fellow looked up at his mother and asked, "If I thank God for the broccoli, won't he know that I'm lying?"
A daddy was listening to his child say his prayer "Dear Harold," At this, dad interrupted and said, "Wait a minute, "How come you called God, Harold? The little boy looked up and said, "That's what they call Him in church. You know the prayer we say, "Our Father, who art in Heaven, Harold be Thy name."
One night Mike's parents overheard this prayer. "Now I lay me down to rest, and hope to pass tomorrow's test, if I should die before I wake, that's one less test I have to take."
A five-year-old said grace at family dinner one night. "Dear God, thank you for these pancakes." When he concluded, his parents asked him why he thanked God for pancakes when they were having chicken. He smiled and said, "I thought I'd see if He was paying attention tonight."
A little boy's prayer: "Dear God, please take care of my daddy and my mommy and my sister and my brother and my doggy and me. Oh, please take care of yourself, God. If anything happens to you, we're gonna be in a big mess."
Johnny had been misbehaving and was sent to his room. After a while he emerged and informed his mother that he had thought it over and then said a prayer. "Fine," said the pleased mother. "If you ask God to help you not misbehave, He will help you." "Oh, I didn't ask Him to help me not misbehave," said Johnny. I asked Him to help you put up with me."
A little boy was overheard praying: "Lord, if You can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it. I'm having a real good time like I am!"
A little boy was saying his bedtime prayers with his mother: "Lord, bless Mommy and Daddy, and God, GIVE ME A NEW BICYCLE!!!" Mom: "God's not deaf, son." Boy: "I know, Mom, but Grandma's in the next room, and she's hard of hearing!
Little Johnny was softly saying his night prayers kneeling down, and his mother was beside him. "Say your prayers louder, darling, I can't hear you," Said Little Johnny's mother. "But I'm not talking to you" was the instant reply.
One Sunday in a Midwest city a young child was "acting up" during the morning worship hour. The parents did their best to maintain some sense of order in the pew but were losing the battle. Finally the father picked the little fellow up and walked sternly up the aisle on his way out. Just before reaching the safety of the foyer the little one called loudly to the congregation, "Pray for me! Pray for me!"
And this particular four-year-old prayed: "And forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."
A woman invited some people over for dinner. At the table she turned to her six-year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?" The girl replied, "I wouldn't know what to say." "Just say what you heard Mommy say," the mother answered. The daughter bowed her head and said, "Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?
A 5 year old boy was sitting down to eat when his mother asked him to pray for his meal. He replied, "Mom we don't have to. We prayed over this last night." His mother had prepared leftovers from the day before.
A 4-year-old boy who was asked to return thanks before Christmas dinner. The family members bowed their heads in expectation. He began his prayer, thanking God for all his friends, naming them one by one. Then he thanked God for Mommy, Daddy, brother, sister, Grandma, Grandpa, and all his aunts and uncles. Then he began to thank God for the food. He gave thanks for the turkey, the dressing, the fruit salad, the cranberry sauce, the pies, the cakes, even the Cool Whip. Then he paused, and everyone waited--and waited. After a long silence, the young fellow looked up at his mother and asked, "If I thank God for the broccoli, won't he know that I'm lying?"
A daddy was listening to his child say his prayer "Dear Harold," At this, dad interrupted and said, "Wait a minute, "How come you called God, Harold? The little boy looked up and said, "That's what they call Him in church. You know the prayer we say, "Our Father, who art in Heaven, Harold be Thy name."
One night Mike's parents overheard this prayer. "Now I lay me down to rest, and hope to pass tomorrow's test, if I should die before I wake, that's one less test I have to take."
A five-year-old said grace at family dinner one night. "Dear God, thank you for these pancakes." When he concluded, his parents asked him why he thanked God for pancakes when they were having chicken. He smiled and said, "I thought I'd see if He was paying attention tonight."
A little boy's prayer: "Dear God, please take care of my daddy and my mommy and my sister and my brother and my doggy and me. Oh, please take care of yourself, God. If anything happens to you, we're gonna be in a big mess."
Johnny had been misbehaving and was sent to his room. After a while he emerged and informed his mother that he had thought it over and then said a prayer. "Fine," said the pleased mother. "If you ask God to help you not misbehave, He will help you." "Oh, I didn't ask Him to help me not misbehave," said Johnny. I asked Him to help you put up with me."
A little boy was overheard praying: "Lord, if You can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it. I'm having a real good time like I am!"
A little boy was saying his bedtime prayers with his mother: "Lord, bless Mommy and Daddy, and God, GIVE ME A NEW BICYCLE!!!" Mom: "God's not deaf, son." Boy: "I know, Mom, but Grandma's in the next room, and she's hard of hearing!
Little Johnny was softly saying his night prayers kneeling down, and his mother was beside him. "Say your prayers louder, darling, I can't hear you," Said Little Johnny's mother. "But I'm not talking to you" was the instant reply.
One Sunday in a Midwest city a young child was "acting up" during the morning worship hour. The parents did their best to maintain some sense of order in the pew but were losing the battle. Finally the father picked the little fellow up and walked sternly up the aisle on his way out. Just before reaching the safety of the foyer the little one called loudly to the congregation, "Pray for me! Pray for me!"
And this particular four-year-old prayed: "And forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."
Saturday, September 26, 2009
School Phone Menu
"Hello! You have reached the automated answering service of your school. In order to assist you in connecting to the right staff member, please listen to all the options before making a selection:
- To lie about why your child is absent - Press 1
- To make excuses for why your child did not do his work - Press 2
- To complain about what we do - Press 3
- To swear at staff members - Press 4
- To ask why you didn't get information that was already enclosed in your newsletter and several fliers mailed to you - Press 5
- If you want us to raise your child - Press 6
- If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone - Press 7
- To request another teacher, for the third time this year - Press 8
- To complain about bus transportation - Press 9
- To complain about school lunches - Press 0
- If you realize this is the real world and your child must be accountable and responsible for his/her own behavior,class work, homework and that it's not all the teachers' fault for your child's lack of effort: Hang up and have a nice day!
- To lie about why your child is absent - Press 1
- To make excuses for why your child did not do his work - Press 2
- To complain about what we do - Press 3
- To swear at staff members - Press 4
- To ask why you didn't get information that was already enclosed in your newsletter and several fliers mailed to you - Press 5
- If you want us to raise your child - Press 6
- If you want to reach out and touch, slap or hit someone - Press 7
- To request another teacher, for the third time this year - Press 8
- To complain about bus transportation - Press 9
- To complain about school lunches - Press 0
- If you realize this is the real world and your child must be accountable and responsible for his/her own behavior,class work, homework and that it's not all the teachers' fault for your child's lack of effort: Hang up and have a nice day!
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Child's Definition of LOVE.
A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, "What does love mean?" The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think:
"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love." Rebecca - age 8
When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You know that your name is safe in their mouth." Billy - age 4
"Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other." Karl - age 5
"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs." Chrissy - age 6
"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired." Terri - age 4
Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK." Danny - age 7
"Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss" Emily - age 8
"Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen," Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)
"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate," Nikka - age 6
"There are two kinds of love. Our love. God's love. But God makes both kinds of them." Jenny - age 8
"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday." Noelle - age 7
"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well." Tommy - age 6
"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore," Cindy - age 8
"My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night." Clare - age 6
"Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken." Elaine -age 5
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford." Chris - age 7
"Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day." Mary Ann - age 4
"I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones." Lauren - age 4
"When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you." Karen - age 7
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross." Mark - age 6
"You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget," Jessica - age 8
Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child. The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked him what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, "Nothing, I just helped him cry."
"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love." Rebecca - age 8
When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You know that your name is safe in their mouth." Billy - age 4
"Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other." Karl - age 5
"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs." Chrissy - age 6
"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired." Terri - age 4
Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK." Danny - age 7
"Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss" Emily - age 8
"Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen," Bobby - age 7 (Wow!)
"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate," Nikka - age 6
"There are two kinds of love. Our love. God's love. But God makes both kinds of them." Jenny - age 8
"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday." Noelle - age 7
"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well." Tommy - age 6
"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore," Cindy - age 8
"My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night." Clare - age 6
"Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken." Elaine -age 5
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford." Chris - age 7
"Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day." Mary Ann - age 4
"I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones." Lauren - age 4
"When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you." Karen - age 7
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross." Mark - age 6
"You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget," Jessica - age 8
Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child. The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked him what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, "Nothing, I just helped him cry."
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
The Top Ten Myths of Divorce
Discussion of the most common misinformation about divorce
David Popenoe
1. Because people learn from their bad experiences, second marriages tend to be more successful than first marriages.
Although many people who divorce have successful subsequent marriages, the divorce rate of remarriages is in fact higher than that of first marriages.
2. Living together before marriage is a good way to reduce the chances of eventually divorcing.
Many studies have found that those who live together before marriage have a considerably higher chance of eventually divorcing. The reasons for this are not well understood. In part, the type of people who are willing to cohabit may also be those who are more willing to divorce. There is some evidence that the act of cohabitation itself generates attitudes in people that are more conducive to divorce, for example the attitude that relationships are temporary and easily can be ended.
3. Divorce may cause problems for many of the children who are affected by it, but by and large these problems are not long lasting and the children recover relatively quickly.
Divorce increases the risk of interpersonal problems in children. There is evidence, both from small qualitative studies and from large-scale, long-term empirical studies, that many of these problems are long lasting. In fact, they may even become worse in adulthood.
4. Having a child together will help a couple to improve their marital satisfaction and prevent a divorce.
Many studies have shown that the most stressful time in a marriage is after the first child is born. Couples who have a child together have a slightly decreased risk of divorce compared to couples without children, but the decreased risk is far less than it used to be when parents with marital problems were more likely to stay together “for the sake of the children.”
5. Following divorce, the woman’s standard of living plummets by seventy three percent while that of the man’s improves by forty two percent.
This dramatic inequity, one of the most widely publicized statistics from the social sciences, was later found to be based on a faulty calculation. A reanalysis of the data determined that the woman’s loss was twenty seven percent while the man’s gain was ten percent. Irrespective of the magnitude of the differences, the gender gap is real and seems not to have narrowed much in recent decades.
6. When parents don’t get along, children are better off if their parents divorce than if they stay together.
A recent large-scale, long-term study suggests otherwise. While it found that parents’ marital unhappiness and discord have a broad negative impact on virtually every dimension of their children’s well-being, so does the fact of going through a divorce. In examining the negative impacts on children more closely, the study discovered that it was only the children in very high conflict homes who benefited from the conflict removal that divorce may bring. In lower-conflict marriages that end in divorce—and the study found that perhaps as many as two thirds of the divorces were of this type—the situation of the children was made much worse following a divorce. Based on the findings of this study, therefore, except in the minority of high-conflict marriages it is better for the children if their parents stay together and work out their problems than if they divorce.
7. Because they are more cautious in entering marital relationships and also have a strong determination to avoid the possibility of divorce, children who grow up in a home broken by divorce tend to have as much success in their own marriages as those from intact homes.
Marriages of the children of divorce actually have a much higher rate of divorce than the marriages of children from intact families. A major reason for this, according to a recent study, is that children learn about marital commitment or permanence by observing their parents. In the children of divorce, the sense of commitment to a lifelong marriage has been undermined.
8. Following divorce, the children involved are better off in stepfamilies than in single-parent families.
The evidence suggests that stepfamilies are no improvement over single-parent families, even though typically income levels are higher and there is a father figure in the home. Stepfamilies tend to have their own set of problems, including interpersonal conflicts with new parent figures and a very high risk of family breakup.
9. Being very unhappy at certain points in a marriage is a good sign that the marriage will eventually end in divorce.
All marriages have their ups and downs. Recent research using a large national sample found that eighty six percent of people who were unhappily married in the late 1980s, and stayed with the marriage, indicated when interviewed five years later that they were happier. Indeed, three fifths of the formerly unhappily married couples rated their marriages as either “very happy” or “quite happy.”
10. It is usually men who initiate divorce proceedings
Two-thirds of all divorces are initiated by women. One recent study found that many of the reasons for this have to do with the nature of our divorce laws. For example, in most states women have a good chance of receiving custody of their children. Because women more strongly want to keep their children with them, in states where there is a presumption of shared custody with the husband the percentage of women who initiate divorces is much lower. Also, the higher rate of women initiators is probably due to the fact that men are more likely to be "badly behaved." Husbands, for example, are more likely than wives to have problems with drinking, drug abuse, and infidelity.
David Popenoe
1. Because people learn from their bad experiences, second marriages tend to be more successful than first marriages.
Although many people who divorce have successful subsequent marriages, the divorce rate of remarriages is in fact higher than that of first marriages.
2. Living together before marriage is a good way to reduce the chances of eventually divorcing.
Many studies have found that those who live together before marriage have a considerably higher chance of eventually divorcing. The reasons for this are not well understood. In part, the type of people who are willing to cohabit may also be those who are more willing to divorce. There is some evidence that the act of cohabitation itself generates attitudes in people that are more conducive to divorce, for example the attitude that relationships are temporary and easily can be ended.
3. Divorce may cause problems for many of the children who are affected by it, but by and large these problems are not long lasting and the children recover relatively quickly.
Divorce increases the risk of interpersonal problems in children. There is evidence, both from small qualitative studies and from large-scale, long-term empirical studies, that many of these problems are long lasting. In fact, they may even become worse in adulthood.
4. Having a child together will help a couple to improve their marital satisfaction and prevent a divorce.
Many studies have shown that the most stressful time in a marriage is after the first child is born. Couples who have a child together have a slightly decreased risk of divorce compared to couples without children, but the decreased risk is far less than it used to be when parents with marital problems were more likely to stay together “for the sake of the children.”
5. Following divorce, the woman’s standard of living plummets by seventy three percent while that of the man’s improves by forty two percent.
This dramatic inequity, one of the most widely publicized statistics from the social sciences, was later found to be based on a faulty calculation. A reanalysis of the data determined that the woman’s loss was twenty seven percent while the man’s gain was ten percent. Irrespective of the magnitude of the differences, the gender gap is real and seems not to have narrowed much in recent decades.
6. When parents don’t get along, children are better off if their parents divorce than if they stay together.
A recent large-scale, long-term study suggests otherwise. While it found that parents’ marital unhappiness and discord have a broad negative impact on virtually every dimension of their children’s well-being, so does the fact of going through a divorce. In examining the negative impacts on children more closely, the study discovered that it was only the children in very high conflict homes who benefited from the conflict removal that divorce may bring. In lower-conflict marriages that end in divorce—and the study found that perhaps as many as two thirds of the divorces were of this type—the situation of the children was made much worse following a divorce. Based on the findings of this study, therefore, except in the minority of high-conflict marriages it is better for the children if their parents stay together and work out their problems than if they divorce.
7. Because they are more cautious in entering marital relationships and also have a strong determination to avoid the possibility of divorce, children who grow up in a home broken by divorce tend to have as much success in their own marriages as those from intact homes.
Marriages of the children of divorce actually have a much higher rate of divorce than the marriages of children from intact families. A major reason for this, according to a recent study, is that children learn about marital commitment or permanence by observing their parents. In the children of divorce, the sense of commitment to a lifelong marriage has been undermined.
8. Following divorce, the children involved are better off in stepfamilies than in single-parent families.
The evidence suggests that stepfamilies are no improvement over single-parent families, even though typically income levels are higher and there is a father figure in the home. Stepfamilies tend to have their own set of problems, including interpersonal conflicts with new parent figures and a very high risk of family breakup.
9. Being very unhappy at certain points in a marriage is a good sign that the marriage will eventually end in divorce.
All marriages have their ups and downs. Recent research using a large national sample found that eighty six percent of people who were unhappily married in the late 1980s, and stayed with the marriage, indicated when interviewed five years later that they were happier. Indeed, three fifths of the formerly unhappily married couples rated their marriages as either “very happy” or “quite happy.”
10. It is usually men who initiate divorce proceedings
Two-thirds of all divorces are initiated by women. One recent study found that many of the reasons for this have to do with the nature of our divorce laws. For example, in most states women have a good chance of receiving custody of their children. Because women more strongly want to keep their children with them, in states where there is a presumption of shared custody with the husband the percentage of women who initiate divorces is much lower. Also, the higher rate of women initiators is probably due to the fact that men are more likely to be "badly behaved." Husbands, for example, are more likely than wives to have problems with drinking, drug abuse, and infidelity.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Eid Al-Fitr
'Id Al-Fitr or Eid al-Fitr (Arabic for "Festival of the Breaking of the Fast") is one of Islam's two major festivals. It marks the end of Ramadan, the holy month of fasting, and is celebrated during the first three days of the month of Shawwal.
The festival "is distinguished by the performance of communal prayer (salat) at daybreak on its first day. It is a time of official receptions and private visits, when friends greet one another, presents are given, new clothes are worn, and the graves of relatives are visited." The traditional greeting for 'Id Al-Fitr is "'Id Mabarak" ("May God make it a blessed feast").
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
New American Idol Judge
Ellen DeGeneres Named New 'American Idol' Judge
The TV talk show host announced the news during a taping of "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" on Wednesday that she is the new "Idol" judge, filling a seat left vacant by Paula Abdul, who chose not to return to the show last month.
Manners for Moving Up
Manners for Moving Up
(by: Julie Yap Daza)
Why manners?
Along the way as we grow and climb the ladder of success, from high school to college, from graduation to a first job, from single and carefree, to head or heart of the family, we nned friends who add to the pleasure of every social occasion.
But we also run into strangers. Are they nice people? Should we be ncie to them? who should take the first step?
Who needs manners?
Anyone who wants to win friends and be a better friend. Everyone realizes life can be more pleasant and enjoyable if everyone else followed the rules. All of us can be more pleasant and enjoyable if everyone else followed the rules. All of us place a premium on being considerate and thoughtful of others.
You don't need manners if you are:
1. a bum
2. a hermit
3. shipwrecked and all alone on an island
4. a convict on death row
5. an inmate in a mental institution
6. living alone and never coming out of your house
7. being consistent with your lifetime habits of not ever brushing your teeth, taking a bath, and changing clothes
8. a beggar
9. still in your mother's womb
Along the way as we grow and climb the ladder of success, from high school to college, from graduation to a first job, from single and carefree, to head or heart of the family, we nned friends who add to the pleasure of every social occasion.
But we also run into strangers. Are they nice people? Should we be ncie to them? who should take the first step?
Who needs manners?
Anyone who wants to win friends and be a better friend. Everyone realizes life can be more pleasant and enjoyable if everyone else followed the rules. All of us can be more pleasant and enjoyable if everyone else followed the rules. All of us place a premium on being considerate and thoughtful of others.
You don't need manners if you are:
1. a bum
2. a hermit
3. shipwrecked and all alone on an island
4. a convict on death row
5. an inmate in a mental institution
6. living alone and never coming out of your house
7. being consistent with your lifetime habits of not ever brushing your teeth, taking a bath, and changing clothes
8. a beggar
9. still in your mother's womb
Contents: (click the links)
- Hello! Hello!
- Save Lives, Know How, Where and When to Cross the
Street. - The Mall is All
- Ladies an Gentlemen!
- Dress Up, Dress Down, Dress Right!
- Basic Good Grooming for Men
- And For The Ladies
- NO, NO, NO, GUYS!
- Stay Sexy, Guys!
- Light Up, Lighten UP
- First Date at the Disco
- TABLE MATTERS!
Use the telephone only when you have to....whether it's your own telephone,your office phone, or someone else's phone, but especially when it's not your phone.
Whether you are calling or being called, keep the conversation short. It is good manners to keep the telephone free for others to use.
When you have dialed a wrong number, say 'Sorry.' It sounds almost as good as 'Hello.'
On the telephone, your voice is you. Do not sound indifferent, irritated, or intimidating. If the call is not for you, offer to take a message.
- Use the pedestrian lane. It is usually marked w/ white stripes.
- When there is ni pedestrian lane, cross from corner to corner.
MOTORISTS MUST RESPECT PEDESTRIANS.
They come to a full stop as soon as a pedestrian puts his/her foot on the pedestrian lane. When approaching an intersection, motorists slow down and stop for the sake of pedestrians crossing or about to cross. BUT PEDESTRIANS MUST RESPECT THEIR OWN VULNERABILITY.
Don't Court Danger. Don't be a jaywalker. A jaywalker darts between cars, takes short cuts and risks his own life and those of others.
WINDOW SHOPPING is a wonderful pastime. However, as you browse from window to window, be aware that other people on the sidewalk do not have the kind of time that you have.
LET THEM PASS. Be mindful of what you are doing and where you are going so they don't bump into you or you into them.
LET THEM PASS. Be mindful of what you are doing and where you are going so they don't bump into you or you into them.
DON'T BLOW YOUR HORN UNNECESSARILY, and don't blow your horn when you
know it's useless to do so.
know it's useless to do so.
The Mall is ALL
The mall is all the church (or temple), park, and marketplace used to be. This is where everyone goes to do everything - shop, eat, browse, people-watch, kill time, meet friends, play video games,
keep a rendezvous.
YOU CANNOT AVOID PEOPLE IN A MALL. This is where space, because it is so publicly shared, is important to each and every private individual. You don't want others intruding into your space, any more than they want you in theirs. In short, let's all have some mall manners.
The mall is all the church (or temple), park, and marketplace used to be. This is where everyone goes to do everything - shop, eat, browse, people-watch, kill time, meet friends, play video games,
keep a rendezvous.
YOU CANNOT AVOID PEOPLE IN A MALL. This is where space, because it is so publicly shared, is important to each and every private individual. You don't want others intruding into your space, any more than they want you in theirs. In short, let's all have some mall manners.
- Don't hold up the queue.
- DOn't crowd; it's crowded enough as it is.
- DOn't be rowdy if you're a group.
- Don't be a bully in the parking lot.
- If you're waiting for the elevator, let the people inside get out first before you rush in.
In the elevator, if you have to talk, keep voices low. Better still, wait to get off before you begin your conversation.
Make way for others in the corridors, hallways, escalators, stairs.
Make way for others in the corridors, hallways, escalators, stairs.
Don't obstruct traffic. Don't sit on the stairs. Don't block exits and entrances.
Throw litter int he trash can. Use the toilet as if it were your own.
RESPECT THE RIGHT OF OTHERS TO ENJOY THEMSELVES AND HAVE
A GOOD TIME.
Throw litter int he trash can. Use the toilet as if it were your own.
RESPECT THE RIGHT OF OTHERS TO ENJOY THEMSELVES AND HAVE
A GOOD TIME.
Ladies and Gentlemen!
Introductions are a killer if you depend on complicated, old-fashioned rules of who to introduce to whom. The most simple rule to remember is THE WOMAN'S NAME IS MENTIONED FIRST.
For example: "Lydia, I'd like you to meet David." Or, "Lydia, this is David." Once you know this rule by heart, it will be easy for you to remember that the name of the older and more important person is mentioned first.
"Sister Agnes, this is my cousin Bobby." And, "Your Excellency, may i present to you my wife, Jane."
Introductions are a killer if you depend on complicated, old-fashioned rules of who to introduce to whom. The most simple rule to remember is THE WOMAN'S NAME IS MENTIONED FIRST.
For example: "Lydia, I'd like you to meet David." Or, "Lydia, this is David." Once you know this rule by heart, it will be easy for you to remember that the name of the older and more important person is mentioned first.
"Sister Agnes, this is my cousin Bobby." And, "Your Excellency, may i present to you my wife, Jane."
- A gentleman stands up to meet a lady, whether she is older or younger.
- A lady does not have to stand up to be introduced to a man unless he is older or enjoys a higher rank. She does not have to stand up for a younger person or someone her age.
- A gentleman waits for a lady to offer her hand for a handshake.
A woman wants to be treated like a lady even if she is an advocate of women's lib, women's rights, and equality of the sexes. Deep down in her heart, she still wants a man to open the door for her, pull a chair for her, pay for dinner.
A man who treats her like a lady has everything to gain, especially a good reputation.
Ladies first, as they always say. the lady is first to walk through an open door, to sit, to order a drink or food int he restaurant.
There is one exception tot his rule. She does not precede the gentleman when they are going down the stairs or an escalator. The man goes ahead. Once they arrived at the landing, the gentleman gently takes her by the elbow and guides her to where they have to go.
There is one exception tot his rule. She does not precede the gentleman when they are going down the stairs or an escalator. The man goes ahead. Once they arrived at the landing, the gentleman gently takes her by the elbow and guides her to where they have to go.
On the sidewalk, the gentleman walks on the side near the street. In the theater, the lady, if she is escorted by a gentleman, does not take an aisle seat. That's for her escort.
WHEN THEY ARE CROSSING THE STREET, THE GENTLEMAN GOES TO THE SIDE WHERE THE CARS ARE COMING FROM.
TABOO
Gentleman and ladies don't give each other intimate gifts of a personal nature unless they are lovers, engaged to be married, or married to each other.
DON'T GIVE UNDERWEAR, expensive jewelry, anything that could be misconducted. For example, why give him deodorant unless you're trying to say he has B.O. (body odor)?
Gentleman and ladies don't give each other intimate gifts of a personal nature unless they are lovers, engaged to be married, or married to each other.
DON'T GIVE UNDERWEAR, expensive jewelry, anything that could be misconducted. For example, why give him deodorant unless you're trying to say he has B.O. (body odor)?
When a man and woman are out on a date in a restaurant, she does not tell the waiter her order. She tells it to her escort, who will tell the waiter. The gentleman saves the day by asking her before she has a chance to collar the waiter. What would you like to have? the gentleman asks the lady.
Lesson: Lady, wait for your date to ask. If the waiter has not been properly trained and he asks you instead of him, pretend you're still trying to make up your mind. Read the menu or turn to your date and give him the cue, "SHOULD WE GO FOR THE BLUE MARLIN OR THE LOBSTER
THERMIDOR?"
Lesson: Lady, wait for your date to ask. If the waiter has not been properly trained and he asks you instead of him, pretend you're still trying to make up your mind. Read the menu or turn to your date and give him the cue, "SHOULD WE GO FOR THE BLUE MARLIN OR THE LOBSTER
THERMIDOR?"
WHO PAYS???
It's an Oriental tradition that the gentleman pays. But the lady should understand and offer to pay if:
It's an Oriental tradition that the gentleman pays. But the lady should understand and offer to pay if:
- he is younger
- he is earning less
- it's a Dutch treat and everybody pays for his and her own food and drinks.
Q & A
Q. Should a woman invite a man to have luch or dinner with her?
A. Of course. This is the 90's, remember?
Q. How should she go about it?
A. Naturally, simply and sincerely. She should state her intention clearly, taking care not to come on too strong and eager. A professional reason is one of the least complicated ways to invite a man. For example, to go over the terms of her insurance policy with the manager or CEO who had convinced her to buy a policy in the first place; to discuss securities and investments with her banker; to acquire background information on a sensitive issue from a news source if she is a journalist.
Q. Who should pay?
A. The one who did the inviting. Nonetheless, most men won't let the women
pay. But if he lets you pay for his lunch, don't blame him.
Q. Should a woman invite a man to have luch or dinner with her?
A. Of course. This is the 90's, remember?
Q. How should she go about it?
A. Naturally, simply and sincerely. She should state her intention clearly, taking care not to come on too strong and eager. A professional reason is one of the least complicated ways to invite a man. For example, to go over the terms of her insurance policy with the manager or CEO who had convinced her to buy a policy in the first place; to discuss securities and investments with her banker; to acquire background information on a sensitive issue from a news source if she is a journalist.
Q. Who should pay?
A. The one who did the inviting. Nonetheless, most men won't let the women
pay. But if he lets you pay for his lunch, don't blame him.
Because you do not call attention by sticking out like a sore thumb. By being under dressed, you can blend into the woodwork and hope that there are other who are similarly under dressed.
TO DRESS DOWN DOES NOT MEAN BEING SHABBY.
The truly stylish who dress down occasionally have learned a few basic rules by heart.
CLOTHES ARE IMMACULATELY CLEAN AND CLEANLY, SIMPLY CUT.
Simple is not plain or boring. Underplay colors by using noncolors - black, white, beige, tan, navy.
Use little or no jewelry.
TO DRESS DOWN DOES NOT MEAN BEING SHABBY.
The truly stylish who dress down occasionally have learned a few basic rules by heart.
CLOTHES ARE IMMACULATELY CLEAN AND CLEANLY, SIMPLY CUT.
Simple is not plain or boring. Underplay colors by using noncolors - black, white, beige, tan, navy.
Use little or no jewelry.
NIGHTIME DRESSING, when the sun has gone down and people are in a playful, after-work mood, allows men and womenleeway in the choice of CLOTHING, STYLES, COLORS, ACCESSORIES, JEWELRY.
When daylight has faded and evening shadows move among the light cast by moon and stars, candles, black, are appropriate. So is a bit more daring ind ressing, makeup or grooming, and jewelry.
NIGHT IS THE TIME FOR PARTIES, the theater, a romantic dinner set in the midst of crystal and silver. This is the time to break the rules for dressing by day.
When daylight has faded and evening shadows move among the light cast by moon and stars, candles, black, are appropriate. So is a bit more daring ind ressing, makeup or grooming, and jewelry.
NIGHT IS THE TIME FOR PARTIES, the theater, a romantic dinner set in the midst of crystal and silver. This is the time to break the rules for dressing by day.
- By day wear cotton or linen. By night, wear silk or satin.
- By day wear simple gold jewelry, pearls, a classic watch.
- By night, have fun and go funky, let your hair down. Go with the glow of colored stones if that is your caprice.
- Daytime, alight perfume or cologne is preferable to a musky, seductive scent.
- By day, wear an easy hairstyle, easy to comb.
- Wear all the black you want at night. Elsa
- Klensch of CNN says wear black not to play but to cut a dramatic figure.
Standing Before the Mirror
- Sexy clothes are for sexy people to be worn to sexy places.
- You can wear black shoes with almosy aything but you can't wear white shoes with black stockings or socks.
- If you have to wear shoes, they must be clean and shined, in good condition for walking. Do not stand out in them because they'r dirty, grimy, and ready to fall apart. Ugly shoes are a sign of lack of manners and self-esteem.
- Clip nose hairs!
- Clip ear hairs.
- Snip away (do not yank) loose threads in your suits, shirts, pants.
- Polish shoes that need to be polished, wash shoes that need to be washed. Brush suede - not wax!
- Keep your fingernails short and clean. Avoid that pink stuff they spread on parlor, it only makes you look like a vain, dirty old man.
- Cut your toenails, straight across.
- If you insist onw earing an earring, choose something small and subtle. Don't go for the Pirate of the seven Seas look by wearing those awful gold hoops you could put a circus animal through.
- Always check the limbs coming out of your suit.
- Keep everything on your chest (TIE, JEWELRY, SHIRT) Free of stains and as wrinkle free as possible.
- Short wash-and-wear hair is fine and can definitely be SEXY. If you've got long hair, tie it neatly into a no-nonsense ponyail at the back. If it's not long enough, gel back smoothly and show your ears.
- Can we allg et together and pledge a total ban on long, heavy gold chains proudly displayed through an open-till-the-belly-button shirt?
- Shopping for a cologne? Bring your girlfriend, wife or special someone along. After all, she'll be smelling you (and hopefully only you) the most. If she likes it and you like it, the salesgirl can say "SOLD!"
- DO something about your armpit hair! Shaving, they say, leaves armpits dark while plucking may cause infection. Hair remover doesn't get it all out and waxing is as painful as ripping your skin off. So which method do you prefer? ......CHOOSE AND ACT!
- If you're one to shave your legs, please spare your boyfriend or husband the - yuck! - agony of brushing unprotected parts of his body against something that feels like a cheese grater. Not shaving regularly is about as attractive as braiding you nose hair.
- NEVER remove your shoes in public, much less rub your toes and ankles together while you're at it. If you think your toes are pretty enough to be edible, admire them in the privacy of your home.
- Water-proof makeup in a tropical climate prevents smudging caused by sweat.
- Keep your hair neat and tidy, and please, keep it out of other people's faces but don't brush it in public.
- Fragrance is whatever form of cologne, eau de toilette, lotion, perfume should be subtle and mysterious. Not overwhelming and sneeze-inducing.
No, NO, NO, GUYS!!
Men dress more simply than women, which does not mean that they have an easier time remembering a few basic rules, starting with the NO-NO's:
Men dress more simply than women, which does not mean that they have an easier time remembering a few basic rules, starting with the NO-NO's:
- A short-sleeved shirt or T-shirt under a blazer or coat that's part of a suit. NO!
What goes under a jacket? a shirt with long sleeves, in white or a pale color, plain or in the thinnest stripes. YES! - Loud colors on pants. NO! unless worn by clowns, comedians and entertainers following a script. Loud colors are perfectly all right for beachwear, casual tops, and other leisure wear.
- Heavy jewelry encrusted with stones. NO!
- Sockless in leather and patent shoes. NO! if you must go sans socks, wear sandals.
- Printed shirts in loud colors and in silk (synthetic or otherwise). NO! except at night.
- Jens, shorts, rubber shoes, sneakers, sleeveless shirts, collarless shirts for going to a party. NO!
You will be breaking the dess code and your host's/hostess' heart. - Necktie paired with a patterned or printed shirt. NO!
- Necktie paired with a crumpled shirt. NO!
- Necktie with shortsleeve shirt. NO!
- Necktie with jeans and casual slacks. NO!
Keep two neckties, one for a power lunch, one for dating.
The best colors for socks, and you need only two colors, are black (for your black shoes) and
white (for rubber shoes, tennis shoes, etc..).
Socks must stay high enough above the ankles to cover your legs when you cross them.
White handkerchiefs are better than colored ones.
Embroidered monograms were not designed to be conspicuous.
Wear dark suits at night, for formal occasions, and in winter.
Minors should not smoke. No one should see them tobacco products.
Smokers should respectt the fact that some nonsmokers simply do not want to be near secondhand smoke.
Smokers can ask before they light up, "May I?" It's as simple
as that.
Nonsmokers can show smokers that they recognize that there's a place for them to enjoy a cigarette in a seperate, designated smoking area.
Smokers can ask before they light up, "May I?" It's as simple
as that.
Nonsmokers can show smokers that they recognize that there's a place for them to enjoy a cigarette in a seperate, designated smoking area.
Put everyone, including yourself, at ease by not trying to be someone you're not.
It helps if you're not properly attired and groomed. If you're going to a disco, the dress code in most discos and dance clubs is semi-formal, though this term is used loosely. Another way to describe it is casual chic.
It helps if you're not properly attired and groomed. If you're going to a disco, the dress code in most discos and dance clubs is semi-formal, though this term is used loosely. Another way to describe it is casual chic.
GUYS. Wear a shirt with a collar, whether it's short or long-sleeved. Slacks are better than jeans.
No-no's include sneakers, rubber shoes, and sandals. The way to go is comfortable dress shoes. Leave the baseball cap in the baseball field, please.
GIRLS. It's simpler to say what not to wear. No rubber shoes, no shorts, no T-shirts. Do wear whatever is in style, as long as you can get away with it, in it, anything from the little black dress to jeans and a tank top. Flat shoes or pumps with ine-inch heels are okay for dancing. Unless you're a real expert, stilettos could hurt you, and not only your feet.
Your secret weapon: Use a good deodorant or anti-perspirant. But avoid strong perfumes.
You'll probably see a lot of people you know.
Don't leave your date alone when you socialize.
Introduce him/her to them, but don't spend more time with them than your date.
On the dance floor, don't take upt oo much room. If you don't dance too well, keep your steps simple.
If you're an expert, don't be too eager to show off. Try not to keep looking on other people.
If you're an expert, don't be too eager to show off. Try not to keep looking on other people.
While dancing, restrain the urge to strike up conversation. This isn't the time to share your thoughts about life.
Avoid marathon dancing to he point of exhaustion,or getting your clothes soaked in sweat while you try to catch your breathe.
After two or three numbers, you should be ready to take a break. Don't be embarassed to say you're tired.
A disco is a perfect place for a first date because conversation is light. When you can't think of anything more to say, you can always get back on the dance floor!
TABLE MATTERS!
A table setting includes plates, glasses, spoons, forks and knives, napkins.DO NOT BE INTIMIDATED BY ALL THAT DISPLAY OF CHINA, silver and crystal. Keep in mind that your host or the caterer has arranged the tableware according to the food that will be served. As each course arrives on the table, use the utensils in order of their position - start witht he outermost ones, from left side and right side, moving in toward the plate.
No matter how complicated the setting may appear at first glance, know that there won't be more than four pieces of any group at any one time - no more than four glasses, no more than four knives - besides which, as the dinner progresses, the waiter will be taking away used utensils, course after course.
On the right, knives are placed witht he blade facing the plate. The dessert fork on top of the plate has its handle pointing left because the fork is held with the left hand. The dessert spoon, also on top of
the plate, has its handle pointing right because the spoon is held with the right hand.
the plate, has its handle pointing right because the spoon is held with the right hand.
Napkin is found on the left or at the center of the big plate.
Glasses on the right. Knives and spoon on the right. Forks on the left Dessert fork and spoon above dinner plate. Use outermost utensils first, going in toward plate.
Some DO's and DON'Ts
Pick up the napkin with your left hand when you see your host doing so. Unfold and place it gently on your lap If you find that one of your utensils is for some reason, not well-polished or has some leftover food particle clinging to it, simply ask your waiter to replace it instead of trying to wipe it clean with your napkin.
If you don't know what you're eating, don't be too shy to ask. You are not expected to know everything.
If you don't like what you are eating, don't be too shy to spit it out but do it inconspicuously
.
As much as possible, keep your plate neat and tidy and try not to leave food on your plate.
Do not eat from your neighbor's plate. If you want to try his food, ask for a small piece and put it on your plate for a spare one.
Some food items are eaten with your fingers, for which you will be given a finger bowl: crabs, steamed shrimps with shell on, artichokes (with leaves), oysters, mussels, frog's leg, asparagus
(with branches), quail, pigeon, spareribs, fried chciken.
(with branches), quail, pigeon, spareribs, fried chciken.
Dip your fingertips in the finger bowls, but it is still best to simply excuse yourself and wash your hands in the restroom.
DO NOT BURP! If you just did, say "Excuse me."
DO NOT FART! Excuse yourself from the table and do it elsewhere!
Excuse yourself if you have to leave the table.
Ask permission before you smoke!
Although it is permissible these days to use a toothpick, cover your mouth with your hand when you do. Never pick your teeth with your fingers in public. Go to the restroom to do this privately.
Do no floss in public!
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
God Whispers from Truly Rich Club
Many of your choices aren’t permanent choices. For these choices, pick growth over security. Growth necessitates chaos — at least for a while. If you want growth, be comfortable with chaos.
Here’s a fact: Your blessings outnumber your problems. Your blessings are an ocean. Your problems are a few drops of rain that fall on that ocean. So what will you focus on?
Magnify me and you make your problems small. The bigger I become in your eyes, the smaller your problems become.
Little children are afraid of darkness because they can’t see what’s next. Many adults are still afraid of life because they can’t see what will happen next. For them, life is so uncertain. Not you, You know me.
You know what I’ll do for you. You see your fantastic future. Are you experiencing scarcity? Good. Because scarcity has the power to give a very special gift. Scarcity can give you a great hunger for abundance. This hunger will be your fire in the belly. Some of the wealthiest people in the world have huge hunger because they went through great scarcity.
Some wealthy people, because they love their kids, take away from them the experience of scarcity. They give them instant wealth without training them in hard work. But when scarcity is taken away, they also take away their hunger for success. Thus, many kids squander the wealth of their parents. Just telling you again how important scarcity is in your life.
Here’s a fact: Your blessings outnumber your problems. Your blessings are an ocean. Your problems are a few drops of rain that fall on that ocean. So what will you focus on?
Magnify me and you make your problems small. The bigger I become in your eyes, the smaller your problems become.
Little children are afraid of darkness because they can’t see what’s next. Many adults are still afraid of life because they can’t see what will happen next. For them, life is so uncertain. Not you, You know me.
You know what I’ll do for you. You see your fantastic future. Are you experiencing scarcity? Good. Because scarcity has the power to give a very special gift. Scarcity can give you a great hunger for abundance. This hunger will be your fire in the belly. Some of the wealthiest people in the world have huge hunger because they went through great scarcity.
Some wealthy people, because they love their kids, take away from them the experience of scarcity. They give them instant wealth without training them in hard work. But when scarcity is taken away, they also take away their hunger for success. Thus, many kids squander the wealth of their parents. Just telling you again how important scarcity is in your life.
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