Love

The best part of being in love with someone is being convinced that that person will be with us forever. Most of us start relationship believing in the promise of love without end. Unfortunately, not all relationships end the way we want them to.

To some, love comes in a fleeting moment and goes just as fast. But getting over the feeling always seems to take a lifetime, because the only person who can heal the pain is usually the very same person who hurt us and made us cry.

Sometimes just as we are about to accept the failure of our relationship, that person comes back to us and unknowingly destroys our defenses. Suddenly, we find ourselves hooked on love again. And it hurts even more because we know that person doesn’t share the same feeling anymore.

Even if there is the urge to forget because it hurts, there would always be that compelling reason to hope for love to come back. It is like waiting for the sun to shine in the middle of a storm.

The love that brings us pain should be the same love that would heal our hearts. When you love so much that it begins to hurt, then you have to learn to let go to lessen your pain.

Love hurts, and sometimes it hurts like there is no tomorrow. But there still is and there will always be one. No matter how battered and stricken we have been, there will always be a tomorrow that will bring hope and love. But that tomorrow will never come unless we leave the past behind and live today as we should.

Let the pain remain for a while and let the tears fall as they please. Then after all that, move on and find your place in this world where you will feel that everything is going to be all right.”

COMMITMENT

The most important, most critical component in successful loving is commitment. Not love. It’s easy to love without commitment. People do it all the time—easy to love, to give of oneself for a while. But commitment implies bonding in such a way that one promises to keep the fires of love burning indefinitely.

In the countless counseling sessions I have had with troubled couples over the years, there has always been the problem of a failing commitment on the part of at least one of the partners. Unless there is the raising of the level of commitment, the relationship is doomed. It’s finished. Sooner or later the stresses will take their toll and the relationship will begin to fall apart. On the other hand, look carefully at couples who are still very much in love after 20, 25 years. Their commitment to each other cannot be shaken. Neither can their love.

It also means shutting one’s heart to the possibility of loving another who might even be more attractive, even more lovable. Not easy. This is why solid commitments are not at all as common as we are led to believe. In fact, more often than not, I think that the commitment two lovers make are not equal. What I mean is that the commitment of one might be a whole lot more or a whole lot less than the partner’s.

We see it all the time. One loves more than the other, is more committed than the other. It is false to believe that two lovers love each other to the same degree. We have often seen lopsided love relationships where one partner is giving so much more to the relationship than the other.
But writers and poets seem to always indicate that love isn’t just a two-way street, but an equal two-way street.

That hardly ever happens. It is impossible to determine exactly how much a man loves a woman or how much a woman cares for a man. Love cannot be measured and that can be a huge problem. You can love someone and tell him “I love you” and you’re telling the truth. But how much do you love him? Enough to let him court you? Enough to marry him? Enough to die for him?
The greatest test of true love is commitment. And the greatest indicator of deep love is deep commitment. There can be no doubting this.

I have heard people say all the right words, make all the right moves and pledge undying love, only to walk away weeks or months later.

Were they in love? Sure they were. But not enough to allow them to hold strong in their love. Not enough to keep a commitment regardless of the pain.

A lover gets this sinking feeling when there is a sense that one is more committed than the other. When one is giving a lot more than one is receiving, when one’s love is a lot more solid than the creaky love of the partner.

When a couple believes strongly that their commitment to each other is rock solid, there is a deep sense of security, a feeling that it’s okay to give all because the gift of yourself is safe in the hands of the beloved. If, however, there is doubt or, even worse, the conviction that one is engaged in one-way giving, in a one-way commitment that is lopsided, then there is a tendency to pull back and not give as much. And when that happens, love begins to fade.

Facts about November

Traditions including All Saints Day and All Souls Day

The name comes from the Roman word 'novem' meaning nine, because it was the ninth month in their Roman calendar.



Few people find November pleasant. The Anglo-Saxons called November 'Wind monath', because it was the time when the cold winds began to blow. They also called it 'Blod monath', because it was the time when carnival charactercattle were slaughtered for winter food. The poet T.S. Elliot called it 'Sombre November'. Sir Walter Scott, in his long poem Marmion, wrote in 1808:

               November's sky is chill and drear,

               November's leaf is red and sear (withered)'

The first week of November has always been a time of festivals and celebrations marking the end of the harvest and beginning of Winter


All Saints' Day - 1 November

In the year 835 AD the Roman Catholic Church made 1st November a church holiday to honour all the saints. This feast day is called All Saints' Day.


All Hallows

All Saints' Day used to be known as All Hallows (Hallow being an old word meaning Saint or Holy Person). The feast day actually started the previous evening, the Eve of All Hallows or Hallowe'en.

Christians remember all the saints

On Saints' Day, Christians remember all 'men of good will' (saints), great ones and forgotten ones, who have died through the ages.

Saints are men and women from all ages and all walks of life, who were outstanding Christians. Some - the martyrs - died for their faith. All of them are honoured by the church.

Hallowtide

All Saints' Day, together with All Souls' Day are know collectively as Hallowtide.

Selective Hearing

What a woman says:
This place is a mess! C'mon,
you and I need to clean up.
Your stuff is lying on the floor and you'll have no clothes to wear
if we don't do laundry right now!

What a man hears:
blah, blah, blah, blah, C'MON
YOU AND I blah, blah, blah
blah, blah ON THE FLOOR
blah, blah, blah, NO CLOTHES, blah
blah, blah, blah, blah, RIGHT NOW!

Friendship

I Believe

I believe-
That we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

I believe-
That no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a
while and, you must forgive them for that.

I believe-
That true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance.
Same goes for true love.

I believe-
That you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I believe-
That it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.

 
























I believe-
That you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them

I believe-
That you can keep going long after you can't.

I believe-
That we are responsible for what  we do, no matter how we feel.

I believe-
That either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I believe-
That regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there
had better be something else to take its place.

I believe-
That heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done,
regardless of the consequences.

 

I believe-
That money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I believe-
That my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time!

I believe-
That sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you're down, will be the ones to help you get back up.

I believe-
That sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I believe-
That just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

I believe-
That maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've
learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.

I believe-
That it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others.
Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I believe-
That no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.

I believe-
That our background and circumstances may have influenced
who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I believe-
That just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other,  And just
because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do.

I believe-
That you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.

I believe-
That two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

I believe-
That your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.

I believe-
That even when you think you have no more to give, when a 
friend cries out to you - you will find the strength to help.

I believe-
That credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I believe-
That the people you care about most in life are the essence of life.
Tell them today how much you love them and what they mean to you.